Fear (1996)

What a silly little nothing of a movie. I had never seen Fear - I don't know how I missed it back in 1996 - but it felt like an extra good lifetime movie. The appeal these days is the time capsule this movie has become. Marky Mark with his modelesque torso, Reese Witherspoon looking like she's twelve, and Gil Grissom (I had to look that up, FYI. I've never actually watched an episode of CSI) displaying the acting chops of an oak tree. And the nineties fashion! Could their skirts be any shorter? Could they wear any more plaid? Could they cut Mark Wahlberg's sweatshirt any higher? It was all worth a laugh.

The plotting is absurd. Happily, it was absurd enough to be funny. My favorite bits? Mark Whalberg turning into insane-o boyfriend five minutes after Reese gives it up. It was just like Angel becoming Angelus. Except less realistic. And Mr. Pussy-Pants Garry getting his neck broken after a happy little jaunt home through the darkened woods. And the dog's head through the doggy door! In a better movie, that might actually have been creepy. And the note on daddy's car after the windshield has been busted out! I'll let you check out the movie yourself for that little gem. And the title. What a stupid name for a movie.

This movie was funny. I enjoyed it. There was bad 90s music, bad 90s clothes, Marky Mark, Alyssa Milano, and poor writing. What else does anyone need to construct a movie so bad that its good?